


gift

by reylo-bond (Kinks_are_beautiful)



Category: Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
Genre: Drabble, F/M, Mutual Pining, Reconciliation
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-08
Updated: 2018-01-08
Packaged: 2019-03-02 00:00:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,094
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13306113
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kinks_are_beautiful/pseuds/reylo-bond
Summary: Post TLJ. It's been months since Ben has been able to connect to Rey through their force bond. She shut him out. This is a short one-shot from Ben's pov.





	gift

**Author's Note:**

> Hi guys. This one shot is drabble-ish in nature. It's been quite a while since I wrote anything so please be kind. :)  
> I wanted to write Ben and Rey reconnecting after TLJ in a way I find to be semi-likely. This setting was inspired by how romantic their scars are. He got hurt because of her and almost as if to mirror that, she also got hurt for his sake and because of him. If you don't think their bond will tug on each other when they look at their scars in the mirror? This might make you think about. I'll see myself out now.  
> Forever up Canon Compliant's Ass  
> \- reylo-bond ( J )

Since they separated on Crait, the bond with Rey got suffocatingly quiet for Ben. However, on the rarest occasions, he felt a slight tug coming from her that would pull at his consciousness. Fleeting feelings that he could almost translate in his head, but just as quick as they came, they would vanish in an instant. Just like it never happened. Ben knew, at least on his part, that he thought of Rey and wanted to talk to her one more time and this feeling never really left him, all he could do was try to shove those feelings into a corner in his mind. Sometimes, he would wonder if she missed him too. It was extremely hard for him to reel in his involuntary calls to her but for her sake he did his best to and for the most part, he could.

Part of his daily ritual involved looking in the mirror after his morning shower before his shave and staring at the gift she had left on his face for a time, entering a state of meditation and trying to recall her face, the sound of her voice, in his mind. He found those were one of the harder pulls of missing her that he had to force himself to suppress. Every time he looked at his scar he thought of her and attempted to bury those feelings all over again to survive his lonely days commanding The First Order. They always bubbled to the surface the next day in front of the mirror, though.

One day, after he tried once again to conceal a particularly tenacious longing for her, the demons in his mind spoke to him especially cruel words of hopelessness in ever seeing his girl again, and he felt tears slowly well up in his eyes. He knew the isolation from her was destroying him from the inside out. He looked down in shame, self pity and doubt, rubbing with annoyance at the evidence of his weakness and recomposing himself. But when he looked up, his face didn't look back. He just saw an angel in what should be his own reflection in the mirror. In a turn from concentration, the angel saw him and gasped, immediately turning around so all he could see is the soft flowing locks of her hair. She gripped her bandaged shoulder tightly.

He breathed in deep. “Rey.” Silence filled the bathroom. “How long are you going to shut me out?” His frustration lined on the very edge of his tone and he noted that his voice came out a little louder than he intended it to. Rey instantly returned his question with her own impatient reply. “As long as I need to!”

Ben grimaced and found himself gripping his fists tight. He took her form in, she was rigid and tense. She was also hiding something from him. A feeling? He noticed her bandaged arm again. Intrigued by it, he asked her, “Has your wound still not healed?” He wanted to feel her against his skin so bad. He watched her as she rubbed over the bandage gently. He could sense her remembering something. “My arm healed weeks ago.” … Out of nowhere, Ben was hit by a surge of hurt laced with the guilt of want. He wasn’t sure if these feelings belonged to Rey or to himself. “I see.” He breathed out the air he had been holding in. He had grown short of breath.

Rey’s body shuddered violently and he heard her call out his name desperately in their minds. "Ben...!" She turned to look at his face in her mirror, tears and frustration and regret peaking at her surfaces. “I can’t…” her voice wavered as she choked on her words, still shaking and sweating feverishly. Her youthful pink lips quivered. “I need…” He could feel the conflict rising in her mind, preventing her from finishing what she wanted to say to him the most. Acting impulsively, he felt the new opening in her mind and dived straight in, their energy finally, finally, connected them for the first time in months since she left. He was able to appear behind her and he wrapped his arms around her tiny form. He looked past her head and saw only her reflection in a mirror of fragmented glass. A knowing look glazed over his face. He held her like that for a few minutes until she calmed.

“Rey.” he sighed into her ear. He had never felt such relief, and it flowed through both of them. Tears spilled down her face and Ben gently turned her around to face him and softly kissed the many tears away. Once the tears stopped flowing, he tugged gently at her bandage wrapped around her arm and she let it fall to the floor to reveal the scar of fresh pale skin, a sharp contrast to her sun-kissed body. He lowered his head and kissed her arm scar feather-lightly, his mind etched in gratitude and something else. Her skin lit up in goosebumps. His lips curled up into a smile.

“I’m yours," he whispered into her ear. "I’ll always be yours, sweetheart.” Ben offered himself to her, wrapping gentle and strong arms firmly around her petite body, letting her melt into him. She sighed through a wave of sadness that passed over her. Soon after, she let their connection fade and put her usual blocks in her mind back up. Life went back to as it had always been… almost.

The only difference is a slight glitch in his daily ritual. On most days after his morning shower, he finds himself looking in the mirror at the every day reminder running down his face, but he doesn't deny the pull of her. Rey will respond to him. She is with him there, in mere moments. He knows that she hasn’t forgiven him, but on those blessed days that his angel appears before him, without a word she will stand on her tippytoes, run her hands into his damp hair, pulling his face towards her. She softly kisses his brow, down and along the precious gift she gave him, following it all the way to his chest. Leaving him a trail of fresh wetness and also a burning, aching sensation over his skin. After she is done, she kisses his cheek and disappears back into nothing, leaving Ben to feel the butterflies and their tiny echoes of desire. It's not much, yes, but for Ben... It was enough. 

 

Hope you enjoyed. Thank you for reading!  
-Love J


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